Aren’t difficult people the absolute worst? There are always those Negative Nellies who find the downside in every situation. They try to bring you down with them and sometimes they succeed. As a former pessimist I was constantly trying to change my way of thinking. Trying to look on the positive side of things and seeing the glass as half full. But sometimes it felt so good to just bitch about everything because that is what I knew best. So, when I got around these types of people, I had to work doubly hard to try to keep out of the pessimism pit. If you can eliminate them from your life…great, do it! Unfortunately, that is not always an option.
Co-workers are probably the number one offender when it comes to this particular problem. You usually can’t pick your co-workers or sometimes worse… you did pick them and they turned out to be a dud. And I had me a real doozy at my last job and yep….I picked him. I had been hired first to co-host the morning show and I auditioned with three different guys. I told management who I preferred to work with and they hired him. Oh boy, was that a mistake! It started out great but it didn’t take long before his true colors started showing. He had never done morning radio before and anyone who has can tell you it is completely different from being a DJ any other part of the day. There is a lot more involved. I had been doing morning radio for 25 years and knew a lot about it. I knew things that worked and things that didn’t work. I knew how to open up and be my true self on the air so people would get to know me. It wasn’t long before he started resenting me and feeling threatened.
I tried to rally him and tell him often that we were a team and that we needed to work together in order to succeed. Nope, he wasn’t interested in that. He was more interested in competing with me and trying to one up me as often as he could live on the air. We had many disagreements over the two years we worked together and there were times he would just not talk to me at all. It got to the point that we didn’t talk (unless we absolutely had to) when the microphone was off.
Sound horrible? Honestly, it was. This was such a difficult situation because I had to talk to him on the air and pretend to like him. We had to agree on our show preparations for the next day and what we would discuss. But I was still devastated when I lost my job because I focused on the aspects of the job that I loved. It’s not that he didn’t affect me everyday because he did. But it got to the point that I just had to treat him like the child he was and realize this was the way it was going to be. So, I plowed on and tried not to let him make me miserable. I was very happy to get out of the studio everyday though…for sure.
If you have to deal with a difficult co-worker, I hope you can try to find something that may be good about them??? Something that can be positive in the midst of your dealing with said person. If that isn’t possible then just focus on time you don’t have to spend with them and be grateful for that time.
The thing to keep in mind is that there is so much more to your job than that one or two people. Go in with the attitude that they can be as difficult and negative as they want and you won’t buy into it. If you have tried to point out the bright side in the past and it hasn’t helped, then don’t bother anymore. Negative people generally like being negative and don’t want to look on the bright side. Keep up your attitude of gratitude and let the be the Debbie Downer. Hopefully they aren’t in a position to affect your work. If they are…then sometimes a discussion with a higher up may be in order.
When it comes down to it…don’t let them win. Don’t hide your shine for anyone. You be as big and loud and bright and shiny as you can be. If they don’t like…too freaking bad. You don’t like their attitude. Again, you do you and they can do them. But how sad would it be if you let this person get you down every day? Don’t fall for it. Don’t you do it! Ignore them as much as you can and be your badass self!
It’s hump day people. Go in to work today with an attitude of gratitude and don’t let anyone dull your shine! And make it your best day yet!
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