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  • Writer's pictureThe Hopefulist

The people YOU choose


It’s been said that one of the main factors to happiness is choosing the right person to spend it with. With it being the anniversary of the day I got married, it’s a good time to discuss how important the relationships in our lives are and who we choose to spend our time with. I consider myself to be extremely lucky. I have a man who puts me first. He usually goes along with just about anything I want (except that boat) and in turn I try to make sure he has everything he wants. Joe and I are somewhat opposites in our personality traits. He is extremely laid back, thoughtful, easy to get along with and goes with the flow. I am more uptight, controlling, selfish and like to have my way. So our traits mesh well together. We do have the same values, morals and goals (again, except for that boat!) which are extremely important when it comes to who you spend your life with.


I think one of the biggest factors in the success of our relationship is that he lets me have me way. Haha…I’m kidding although that really is a big part of it. But I do think that it is the fact that we don’t take each other for granted. We appreciate and respect each other. I still leave him little notes to start his day off right. Not every day because then it wouldn’t be special. But often enough that he knows I’m thinking of him and how much I love him. We are extremely polite to each other as well. We say thank you constantly. We still say excuse me when necessary because it’s a matter of respect. If it’s not something that bothers you then it’s not a big deal. It’s just the way we choose to do it.


I often check in with him to see if he is happy and has everything he wants. If there is anything he thinks is missing in his life. You have to prepare yourself to hear some things you may not want to when you broach this subject with your significant other. They may tell you things you don’t want to hear. But keep an open mind and determine if it’s something you can’t handle changing. If it isn’t…have a conversation about a compromise. If you aren’t having the relationship you hoped to have…assess what is missing. Talk to your partner about what you think would make life better for the both of you. These are tough conversations…no doubt. But think about the other side of it. The life you want coming to fruition with the person you love. Make it a judgement free conversation….all idea’s, desires (except kinky stuff, unless you’re into that!) and goals are up for discussion.


Communication really is key. The reason people say it so often is because it’s true. Are you unhappy with your relationship right now? Is there a way you can fix it? Sometimes there isn’t a way you can fix it. Sometimes you have to realize that it’s time to move on. To find someone who will help you realize your dreams and count on you to help them realize theirs. Ending a relationship should never be taken lightly so put a lot of thought into this and if possible, talk to your partner about changes that can be made. But if it truly seems hopeless, then it’s time to assess the situation and maybe get an exit plan. You only get one life…I hope you spend it doing what makes you happy most. Life is too short for anything else.


It’s Monday! My favorite day after Friday, Saturday and Sunday. A brand new week full of possibilities. Take some time to think about how you could make your relationship better and then prepare for a serious, judgement free conversation with your partner. I hope it turns out the way you want it to. And make today, your best day yet!


Listen to me discuss this topic today on my daily podcast available at Hopefulist.com, on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and TuneIn. Just search for "The Hopefulist"!


Please check out my website. It’s your one stop spot for everything “The Hopefulist”. Hopefulist.com.


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